If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
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