First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
