bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
