If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
