Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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