i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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