why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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