i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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