So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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