Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
