great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
