i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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