Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
