I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
handjob tips. give me some.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
