I want to walk on stilts...naked
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize
