I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
