Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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