Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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