Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
