Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
