12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
