he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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