So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
