But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I'm really busy with my period
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