I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
