it hurts more in the daytime
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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