well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
