Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
