my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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