Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
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