New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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