We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
