Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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