These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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