Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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