Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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