All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
