Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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