Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
