I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
