Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
