his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
