rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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