it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
