guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
