Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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