when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
