do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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