If i come over, it means nothing
There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
