I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
